Become a Dominatrix for Your Submissive Lover March 28 2016 1 Comment

 

So, your man has expressed an interest in BDSM, and the thought of having a powerful woman in the bedroom turns him on something rotten. He’s told you he likes the idea of being tied up and flogged until he feels the need to beg you for mercy, or words to that effect. And now you are wanting to make his fantasy a reality, but haven’t a clue where to start. Well, first things first, you’ve got to look the part and have the right equipment. Before the night itself you’ll need to invest in some sexy lingerie (if you don’t already have it).

So, what’s the look you’re going for? Mean leather wearing Dominatrix, or sexy frills and silk? If you answered with the latter, then I am here to kick you up the butt. Your man has just asked you to tie his naked arse down and thrash him senseless, and standing there in a pink babydoll really isn’t going to cut it. And don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that you can’t wear what ever you like and still have a great time and look sexy, it’s just my opinion, your man wants mean, so give him a cruel looking femme fatale.

Now, most of you have agreed with me on the above issue, so let’s look at some gear to get you looking and feeling the part. A corset is a must, and any of the following will suffice, it’s just a matter of taste.

The Rene Rofe Signature Leatherette Corset, and the Strapless Lace Corset will definitely have you feeling the part. Or if you’re really feeling fruity, how about the Fetish Fantasy Rock Out Corset Set? There are many others, but they are a few of my favourites.

If you’re not sure about the oxygen restricting corsets, and are wanting a more comfortable alternative, you could try a bustier. These look similar to corsets, only they don’t cinch like a corset does and they have straps. Some examples are the Rene Rofe Signature Bustier, Rene Rofe Signature Textured Rosette Bustier, and the Curve Metallic Embroidered Bustier.

Next you’ll want to add to your look with stockings and a suspender belt, or maybe a tight pencil skirt, and of course heels or boots. The higher the better, heel wise, and boot wise.

And a tip when doing hair and makeup, be dramatic. Add extra eyeliner, extra mascara, and give that hair some body. Tonight you are Mistress Whiplash and you don’t want to look your everyday self. You want to forget about your job and life’s hassles and be sexy, be powerful, and be naughty with your man.


The Equipment

A blindfold is another must, and sight deprivation is very arousing. Have a look at the Fetish Fantasy Satin Blindfold and the S&M Studded Mask, and see which style takes your fancy.

The Whip, The Crop, The Cat-O-Nine, whichever one you choose make sure you test it out on yourself first. Knowing what it feels like on yourself will help you gauge the strength you’ll need to create anything from a tingle to a sting.

Handcuffs, rope, or cuffs to keep him in place? Again it’s your choice. My particular favourite out of the three is the rope. It’s more versatile and in my opinion more of a sexy feeling. The feel of cold steel snaking around your wrists is nice, but having someone take the time to wrap you in rope and knots, for me, is a sexier experience.   

Setting the Scene

The two most important things here are lighting and music. You’ll want low lighting to create the atmosphere, so I would always opt for candles over lamp light. Now, any candles will do the job, but why not try DONA or Kama Sutra Massage Candles? These look like normal candles but melt into a nourishing oil for massage. The perfect opportunity to add a little extra fear into your man as you hover what he thinks is a hot wax candle above his chest. And an extra bonus is these candles are infused with ingredients that have an aphrodisiac effect, so not only will you have lit the room nicely, you’ll have filled it with the scent of lust too.

On to music now. For music you’ll probably want something bass driven or dark to keep you in the zone of Mistress Whiplash. My recommendations are; Anything by The Weekend, Slippage by Golgfrapp, L’Odeur Animale by Hooverphonic, Soft Control by Laura Welsh, Glory Box by Portishead, Bones by In This Moment, Desire by Meg Myers, All Mine by Portishead, and Pink Floyds Dark Side of the Moon album. I could go on forever, but have a listen to a few and see what you think.

The Script

I’m not talking literally. Before you invite your lover into your boudoir of sin, have a plan. Will you blindfold him as soon as he walks through the door? Will you cuff/bind him? If so, where? What will you say as he enters? Will you make him crawl to your feet? Will you actually be using your whip, or just tormenting him with the sound as it cuts through the air? Just have a rough idea of what you will say and do, it will make the night run smoother and make you feel more relaxed knowing you have a plan.

Confidence

Now that you are set, you look the part, you’ve got what you need, and the room is ready, don’t let all your efforts go to waste now because you feel nervous or silly. Remember you are in control tonight and this is what he wants, so let him have it. Let go! Be wild! Live!  And if all else fails, have a couple of sneaky shots before you begin. What’s the worst that could happen?

Just to be clear, I am by no means a professional at being a Dominatrix. I am just your average woman who likes to dabble in all kinds of fun and kink, and likes to share tips and advice with other women out there, and men, who want to listen.


Thanks for reading.

C.A.Bell X

 

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